Parenting A Child With Autism: Navigating The Hard Days

Parenting a child with autism is a journey filled with profound love, unique challenges, and immeasurable growth. Being a bonus mom to Elijah, who is nonverbal with autism, has stretched me in ways I never imagined. Some days, it feels like life is moving so fast—work deadlines, family responsibilities, personal struggles—and yet, in the middle of it all, I am called to show up with patience, understanding, and love. Which is the case for any child, special needs or not, right?

Navigating the Hard Days

Then, there are days when the world feels heavy. Maybe you’re working full-time, handling life transitions like a divorce, or simply trying to survive a tough season, parenting a child with autism can feel overwhelming. I’ve had days when I have been exhausted from work, only to be met with meltdowns that felt bigger than my energy reserves. In those moments, I’ve learned the power of grace—grace for Elijah and grace for myself.

One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned is that I can’t pour from an empty cup. I once found myself so stretched thin that I was losing the ability to be present. I started carving out small moments for self-care—a five-minute breather in my car before picking Elijah up from school, listening to my favorite worship song while cooking dinner, or finding a supportive friend who could simply listen. These small acts filled my spirit enough to return to my child with love and patience.

I know this is not easy. And I certainly don’t want to make it sound as if I have perfected parenting a child with autism. Because I have not. If anything, I am writing to remind myself how I overcame the hard days. So, I have put a short list of things that have worked for me.

Practical Ways to Parent with Love and Patience

Create Predictability and Routine: I have found that Elijah often finds comfort in routines. A consistent bedtime or morning ritual have provided security even during chaotic seasons. I know moms who keep a visual calendar on the wall so their child knows what to expect daily.

Communicate in Their Language: Even though Elijah is nonverbal, he communicates profoundly. I pay attention to his body language, facial expressions, and sounds. He is actually doing very well with certain words or phrases; I’m so proud of his progress. We use visual aids and simple sign language to support communication.

“Patience means learning to listen beyond words.”

Prioritize Quality Time: When life feels hectic, it’s easy to go on autopilot. Trust me, I have a time or two. Now, I intentionally carve out pockets of quality time – even if it’s 10 minutes of uninterrupted play or a cuddle session before bed. These moments remind Elijah that he is seen and loved. It also centers and reminds me of the power of love. I love him dearly!

Lean on Community: You don’t have to do this alone. I found tremendous support in my close friends, online communities for autism parents, and my therapist, who understands our journey. Having others who “get it” makes the hard days feel a little lighter, like Beaches Resorts specializing in autism care.

Being Human and Superhuman

When you parent a child with autism, you often feel the tension between being human and being superhuman. You are human – you will get tired, frustrated, and stretched thin. And yet, you are also superhuman – you show up with a fierce love and advocacy that only a parent can understand.

I give myself permission to feel both. Cry when it’s hard. Celebrate every small win, whether a new word is spoken or a meltdown is avoided. I embrace imperfection and remind myself that love covers the gaps.

Encouragement for the Journey

If you’re navigating a tough season while parenting a child with autism, know this: You are not alone. Your love is powerful. Your presence matters more than you realize. Give yourself the grace to be human and the courage to be superhuman to those counting on you.

On the days when you feel like you have nothing left, remember that your child doesn’t need a perfect parent—they just need you, a present parent who loves them. And that is more than enough.

Please share this post and the ideas you have to make parenting a child with autism easier.